Anyone who tells you that their kitchen remodel wasn’t stressful at all is lying.
You might have everything picked out, the work is completed on time and you and your significant other are standing in your brand new kitchen overjoyed at the result however something has surely went wrong during the process.
Even small ‘catastrophes’ can result in huge arguments. In fact, some couples even break up over a kitchen remodel. OK, this doesn’t happen in all cases and the worst scenario is perhaps a few days of not talking to each other however wouldn’t it be better if these arguments didn’t happen at all?
While we normally talk about the latest trends in kitchen design or why replacement kitchen doors will benefit your kitchen we want to take a different approach this week. After all, there is no point in having a brand new kitchen if you have no-one to share it with.
Make It A Collaborative Process
The worst thing you can do as a couple is to leave all the work up to one person. Your wife might be great at design and organising everything but what happens when she picks something you don’t like? Or what if your husband wants a kitchen island installed and you hate the idea?
A study showed that 46% of couples took a collaborative approach to remodelling their home. 12% actually considered separating by the end of it. The key is to be in the 46%.
Making the kitchen remodel a joint effort is the cornerstone of a successful remodel. It means that both of you can put forward ideas, deal with the actual organisation involved and have an input into the outcome. 1/3 of people didn’t like their significant others tastes and not addressing this will only end in an argument further down the line.
Expect Small Arguments
Small arguments in a relationship are actually quite healthy. Well, they are healthy as long as they are addressed properly and aren’t left to linger.
The thing with a kitchen remodel is that is it going to be stressful. It is going to take a lot out of you physically and mentally so you need to prepare your relationship to deal with small arguments over replacement kitchen doors, the new tiles and where the table and chairs are going to go when it’s all finished.
Every couple is prone to having an argument at times but the important thing is how to deal with it. Don’t sweep it under the carpet or overreact. Sit down and talk rationally about the kitchen remodel and this will significantly reduce the chances of it having any lasting effects on your relationship.
Money Is An Important Topic
Sometimes people can get carried away when it comes to a kitchen remodel.
It is easy to look online or browse through a showroom and decide that you like everything that you see. The hard bit for many couples is actually affording all these things in the first place. If one member of the couple wants to spend frivolously and the other is more conservative in their budget then this is going to cause friction. There is no point in getting into debt or financial troubles for the sake of a new kitchen.
Make sure that you both sit down and come up with a sound financial plan for how you are going to afford your kitchen remodel. You may need to make some sacrifices in your lifestyle to stretch your budget but ensure that these are shared equally and not just made by one person.
Take A Break From It All
We don’t mean take a break from your relationship – that rarely ends well! – but rather don’t focus everything you have on the kitchen remodel.
This can be difficult when your home is in transition and a kitchen remodel is something that takes a lot of work even if you aren’t carrying it out yourself. The problems arise when your whole life revolves around the renovation. It is healthy to take some time off from coming up with design plans, looking at showrooms and finding someone to carry the work out.
Even a Sunday spent out of the house doing something that doesn’t involve a kitchen remodel in the slightest will mentally clear your head. You will probably also find that whatever you both were arguing about is pretty minor in the grand scheme of things.
Can Your Relationship Survive A Kitchen Remodel?
Of course it can!
The statistic we mentioned earlier – that 12% of couples seriously consider separation after a home remodel – should not be taken lightly however in these cases there were probably underlying factors involved. A breakup over something that is meant to enhance your home such as a kitchen remodel will rarely result in a relationship breakdown in itself. It can be the spark that ignites the fire so to speak but its effects can be minimised by following the guidelines we have posted here.
Make sure the process is a collaborative one, stick to an agreed budget, expect a few minor arguments and make sure you take some time away from the renovation.
Relationships can and do survive a kitchen remodel but it is how you approach the process that will determine how secure it is by the end.